Rick Raw: Tiger Woods Scandal–World’s Most Famous Celebrity Crashes and Burns in The Glare of Tabloid Scrutiny

By Rick Grant Commentary rickgrant01@comcast.net

"Our lovely sex organs don’t know that we have relationship commitments," said Hank Moody (David Duchovny) in "Californication."

Ah yes, Tiger Woods always seemed too good to be true. The world’s best golfer and the most famous global celebrity had an air of invincibility–a Boy Scout. He has earned millions playing golf, and even more millions on endorsements. Nike pays him $30 million a year to use and promote their golf gear and clothing.

Many other big name sponsors throw money at him. Some say he’s close to being a billionaire. The guy has a beautiful Swedish wife, Elin and two lovely children living in a palatial mansion near Orlando, Florida. He has it all–money, fame, and a loving family.

Then the excrement hit the fan. Early one morning, Woods left his mansion in a huff and crashed his mighty Escalade at the end of his driveway. No biggie, right. Wrong! It was a bad omen.

Woods immediately went into lookdown mode in his mansion and refused to talk to police or the media. His behavior was suspicious to the press and the police. What the hell happened? Why is he not talking? After all, it was a minor accident. His silence was deafening.

Soon, the tabloid "The National Enquirer" started digging and came up with the scoop of the year by opening their check book to Woods’ mistresses. The leads started to come in and before you could say uh-oh, Wood’s lovers were coming out of the woodwork. Presently, there are nine mistresses claiming to have hooked up with Woods. No, not Tiger. Mr. Nice Guy. What the hell was he thinking?

The reports were salacious. The "Enquirer" reported that Woods was having an affair with nightclub hostess Rachel Uchitel. She denied the allegations and hired a lawyer, everyone’s least favorite publicity hound, Gloria Alred.

Then, as in all these scandals, an audio tape emerged from Jaimee Grubbs, 24, who said she had a 31 month affair with Woods. On the tape, a man (sounds like Woods to me) says, "I need you to do me a huge favor. Can you please take my name off your phone? My wife went through my phone and may be calling you." On another audio tape a man (presumed to be Woods) is saying to Jaimee, "When I see you, I’ll wear you out."

Speculation arose that the night Woods crashed was the night that Elin found Jaimee’s number on Woods’ phone. They fought, and he stormed out. Yes, Woods was busted and his secret liaisons were made painfully public. The great Tiger Woods was exposed as a lying philanderer.

Finally, Woods made a statement on his website that was too little too late. He begged for privacy and seemed to be sorry, not that he cheated on his wife, but his privacy had been violated and he was exposed as not being a paradigm of virtue-- an image that he had carefully crafted.

Woods should have taken a page out of Hugh Grant’s post scandal play book. He immediately went on the Tonight Show with Jay Leno and confessed, in a humorous way, to the lurid details of his oral sex with a transvestite after Leno said, "What the hell were you thinking?" His bold honesty cleared the way for his career come-back from the scandal.

Woods comes off as the naughty little boy hiding in the closet. Before the scandal, Woods was living a double life with the little-lady at home with the kids, while he was on the road playing golf tournaments and behaving like a single dandy.

Like all serial philanderers, he wanted to protect both lives. But, sooner or later, a man of his high profile celebrity would have been caught with one of his mistresses. Cameras in cell phones and paparazzi are everywhere. Everyone recognizes him anywhere he goes.

Wood’s arrogance to believe that he was above reproach and his privacy was sacrosanct came out in his lame website apology. In this world, celebrities can’t expect complete privacy, especially when they screw-up. People love to see celebrities fall from grace.

So now what? Woods needs to come clean and admit his affairs, not couch them in the euphemism "transgressions." How he handles his PR nightmare will determine his future. By staying detached and silent, he is fueling the tabloid gossip.

Sure, he’s filthy rich and famous, but if he’s sincere, endeavoring to be a better person, repair his marriage, and quit cheating on Elin, then his colleagues and the public will forgive him. If, on the other hand, he continues to hide behind the privacy issue and Elin divorces him, then Tiger’s image will be irrevocably damaged.